BANana's

Sunday, May 29, 2005:

please allow me to adjust my pants so i may dance the good time dance and put the onlookers and innocent bystanders into a trance
Allenini // 7:07 PM

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Its funny.. how when all the signs say to turn left.. i decide to make a right instead, maybe i took a wrong turn...

Natasha Bedingfield - I Bruise Easily Lyrics

My skin is like a map
of where my heart has been
And i cant hide the marks
its not a negative thing
So i let my guard down
drop my defences down by my clothes
i'm learning to fall
with no safety net to cushion the blow

I bruise easily
so be gentle when u handle me
Theres a mark you leave
Like a love heart carved on a tree
I bruise easily
Cant stratch the surface
without moving me underneath...

I bruise easily
I bruise easily

I found you fingerprints
on a glass of wine
Do you know you're leaving them
all over this heart of mine too
But if i never take this leap of faith
I'll never know
So im learning to fall
with no safety net to cushion the blow
[Chorus]

Anyone who can touch you
can hurt you or heal u
Anyone who can reach you
can love you or leave u
So be gentle...
[Chorus]

I bruise easily
I bruise easily
Allenini // 4:50 AM

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Saturday, May 28, 2005:

But i dunno ... if i will be alright for a long time..
Allenini // 2:17 PM

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Tuesday, May 24, 2005:

I dont want to hide anymore.
Allenini // 1:18 AM

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Sunday, May 22, 2005:

If its the only reason we got together, then its the only reason we're appart now.
Allenini // 7:07 PM

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I speak but my voice is not heard.
Allenini // 6:00 PM

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In the end, it boils down to blind faith. I'd rather have faith in an afterlife than nothing at all. If this is ignorance let me enjoy it while i'm alive.
Allenini // 2:10 PM

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Tyson On fear: "Fear is your best friend or your worst enemy. It's like fire. If you can control it, it can cook for you; it can heat your house. If you can't control it, it will burn everything around you and destroy you. If you can control your fear, it makes you more alert, like a deer coming across the lawn.""I'm scared every time I go into the ring, but it's how you handle it. What you have to do is plant your feet, bite down on your mouthpiece and say, 'Let's go.'"
Allenini // 3:08 AM

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Thursday, May 19, 2005:

No matter how hard I breath I am still out of breath.
Allenini // 9:34 PM

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Wednesday, May 18, 2005:

We were all expected to rise to such gret heights, but its ok to be weak. Where did we go wrong, why couldn't we fly. Something broken inside and it hurts but u dont know why; To never know the love of a mother or the warmth of her hug. I know pitty is not something you want to have, but i do not pitty you, because you and I are the same. We've both lost something we cant regain ... i cant stand those eyes, please smile for me again. Why do i concern myself with matters i cannot control. Maybe its because i know i have the power to rescue you... just like you have the power to rescue me...and then i hear the music in the gackground play and the pain fades away. Just tell me you're ok, ( ...okdontjustlie). Even though you'll never see these words ... i think of you all the time.

" I thought about my mom today i always think about her because she like left a gap in my life like i wasnt raised by a mother. Many ppl will tell me the best choice would be to move on and dont think about her. If i wasnt on anti depresent stuff my heart would be in pain whenever i think about my mom. My mom didnt do anything bad too me I think. She left very early after i was born. I always to try to block out my painful memories by doing activities, it does feel like a struggle. "
Allenini // 1:23 PM

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responsibility bites: Eyes
Allenini // 2:15 AM

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Tuesday, May 17, 2005:

Dum di dum...
We say things we dont mean, we mean to say things that we never do, life just goes that way.
Blue turns to pink, pink turns to grey... sorry for all the things i never got to say. BOINK and have a good day :-)
Soooo hungry right now.
Allenini // 12:27 PM

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Sunday, May 15, 2005:

And after a while.. the pain just fades from black to grey, but i suffer and cant remember why
Allenini // 10:25 PM

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assumptions may be missleading.
Allenini // 10:08 PM

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Tuesday, May 10, 2005:

peice by peice, my soul is being robbed by other peoples wants and needs, when will my soul be my own to keep?
Allenini // 12:09 AM

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Sunday, May 01, 2005:

so when this life is over, what will the next be like?
Allenini // 11:26 PM

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